The wish that won’t come true !
Three words that still feel like a stab in my heart are ‘Abu chalay gaye’. It had been three months to my wedding. I had just started a job when in Ramzan I received a phone call when I got home from my sister who told me calmly to come to the hospital near the house. I could hear someone crying at the back and I asked her but she won’t say anything. Just kept repeating ‘ajaen ap’. My hands and feet went cold and I knew what had happened but did not want to accept it.
My abu? Who dropped me to work yesterday? My husband and I rushed to the hospital and I sat with my mom who had her face covered. ‘Boht dair kardi tumne’, she said and my whole world collapsed.
Fathers are a gift from God. Mine didn’t see the birth of my child or him growing up. I often find myself wondering what he would have said at his sharartain or how he would have picked him up and calmed him down when I scolded him.
I wish he would have seen me become the woman I am today. I feel his presence, at times hear him say things to me and guide me when I feel lost. I wish he would have been here longer.